I’m going to be a mummy!

Mum & Bub

I wrote this on Monday 1st February, and can now finally publish it!

I sat on the couch on Sunday morning (31st Jan) and thought ok I have one test left. I’d stupidly not read the packet properly and misread test 6 days before your missed period as test 6 days before your period is due.

So no wonder the tests said negative on Friday. Yes, I did 2 just in case! Then as I was cleaning up the dining table on Saturday for some reason I re-read the packet. Ugh, I thought I was meant to wait until Sunday. So here I was on Sunday morning contemplating whether to wait to see if my monthly friend graced itself with its presence or do the test.

60% of me thought I was pregnant. I had been constantly running into things for the past week seriously bruising myself, and my god did my boobs hurt! I was quite teary, and found myself crying at stupid TV shows in the middle of the day. But then the other 40% of me was a bit cranky had some cramps and thought I was getting my period. Oh well, bugger it I thought, I’ll go pee on another stick and if it’s negative this time I’ll be patient and wait and see if my monthly friend arrives on Thursday.

So I pee’d on the stick and sat it on the sink and looked away. I counted to 120 in my head, told myself if it was negative not to get upset and then turned back. I grabbed the stick mesmerized by what I saw. I walked slowly into the lounge room and sat on the lounge. There were 2 lines. 2 lines, people, TWO LINES! I burst into tears and could barely believe what I was seeing. My poor puppy had no idea what was going on and walked over and sat his head on my leg. I said to Jack (puppy), Mum’s going to have a baby. He did the doggy head tilt thing to the side and looked at me like I was talking gibberish, licked my hand then layed down beside me on the floor.

I tried to call Hubby, wishful thinking he’d pick up, he was out racing the yacht for the day. So I just sat there, puppy by my side and starred at the TV. I was desperate for a baby, but I’d also put an enormous amount of pressure on myself to get pregnant soon so I’d be out of my first trimester when we go overseas. Then I panicked that if I put myself under stress it wouldn’t happen.

Anyway, so sitting there I suddenly thought, hang on, the second line is so faint, maybe I’m too excited too early. So I raced into the supermarket and bought another one. Raced home, and whaddya know? It was positive too. So bloody relieved. So now here we go patiently waiting for the next 8 months to meet our bubba! (about 7 months, now but it was about 8 months back then! Now 10 weeks along!)

I know there’ll be some groans from the male Puff readers about how this blog will no doubt change, but sorry fella’s, I’m taking a right and heading down motherhood lane.

It’s gunna be one hell of a ride! Bring on October 2010!

The 3 month rule

I recently read a very moving story written by blogger Amity Dry called: The unexpected journey to have another baby. You can read the whole article HERE.

Part of what Amity had to say got me thinking about the 12 week, or first trimester ‘rule’ when it comes to pregnancy. Most women keep quiet until the 12 week mark of their pregnancy as this is when you’re chances of miscarriage supposedly go down. That’s of course not to say it doesn’t happen after the 12 week mark.

In Amity’s article she talks of her longing for a second baby and the frustrations and emotional rollacoaster that come with infertility and miscarrage. This is the part of Amity’s article that got me thinking:

“Through all of this I was surprised by how quiet we are as a society on the subject, particularly miscarriage. It seems crazy, us women talk about pretty much anything else, but this topic remains shrouded in silence. I wonder if it’s because we keep our pregnancies secret for the first trimester, so when a miscarriage occurs within that time (which the vast majority do) we keep that a secret too. But, for me, keeping it a secret made me feel as though it was something I had to be ashamed of. A failure I had to hide. It felt as though I had to be stoic and ‘get on with things.’ So I did. I kept busy, I didn’t cry after the first day, I threw myself into my work, stayed strong and outwardly seemed like I was ok. But grief has to come out eventually, as I discovered when it came flooding out in a moment I didn’t expect.”

I can’t comment from experience as I’m yet to try for or have any children. I understand some women keeping quiet in the first 12 weeks for fear of miscarriage and not wanting to deal with the ‘we lost the baby’ conversation with family and friends, but does this contribute to Amity’s feelings above about feeling ashamed? God forbid something happened during your pregnancy would you rather people know and offer support, or would you rather ‘deal with it’ privately behind closed doors?

On a lighter note I also wonder how people actually manage to keep it quiet for 12 weeks, or 10 weeks or you know however long from when you find out your pregnant. These days there’s so many things you’re not meant to eat, drink, breathe in, look at, that it would be so difficult not to get caught out, you’d almost need a University Degree in ‘How to keep your bun in the oven quiet during the first trimester’.

So, as always what do you think? Is the ’12 week rule’ old fashioned, or sensible medically related practice? When did you or your wife/partner tell people you were pregnant? And if you have any funny stories to share on trying to keep bubs quiet for the first trimester, please share. As I said I’m always intrigued how people actually manage to pull it off!

And just for the record, no I’m not pregnant!

A gay man & a newly divorcee. Will they make great parents? Absolutely!

So while we’re on the subject of little people I thought we might have a chat about Sonia and Todd. Who? You ask. Sonia Kruger and Todd McKenney. You know the people off Dancing with the Stars.

So, they have been friends for ever, about 26 years and apparently had a fling back in the day. Todd is gay and Sonia is recently divorced, both are 44. Todd has a daughter with a another close friend.

So where is all this going!! It was revealed yesterday in the Australian Women’s Weekly that Todd has asked Sonia to have a baby with him.

He loves kids, she loves kids, she wants a baby, and knows her biological clock is ticking and might not find Mr Right in time and he would like another child. All sounds good to me. So, end of story? Not quite, of course I have something else to say!

I honestly think that it is a fantastic idea. In this day and age becoming a parent is not as simple anymore as just having sex, and nor should it be. If mother nature or circumstances decides that a woman can’t carry a baby or concieve the old fashioned way then she shouldn’t have to accept it and get over it. People who often have to go to greater lengths to have a baby will no doubt make wonderful parents to their much wanted child. Would they make better parents because they have had to work harder to have a baby? Maybe? Who knows.

Anyway so what are your thoughts on the Sonia and Todd situation? We recently saw the story of the gay couple who travelled all the way to India to have a surrogate give birth to their twin girls. They copped plenty of flak for their decision but I guarantee you they are making wonderful parents.

Lord knows there’s plenty of people out there becoming parents the old fashioned way who shouldn’t even be given the responsibility of a gold fish let alone another human being.

So once again just because you can’t become a parent the old fashioned way, does that mean who shouldn’t be able to? You know what I think, what do you think?