Footloose & child free

I recently wrote about “Flicking the Mummy Switch” and how and  when you decide that you want to have kids. I thought we’d explore the other side of having little people, and that’s choosing not to have them at all.

The concept of not wanting to have children is completely foreign to me but that doesn’t mean that I’m not interested in those who have chosen not to reproduce.

Sometimes I think that there are women who talk about having kids because that’s what society expects of us. I had a friend in high school who did not like kids at all, but yet would still talk about having children. I wonder if she thought she’d ‘like kids’ by the time she came to have children or if she talked about kids because that’s what was expected of her? I have no idea if she has kids now.

Actress Cameron Diaz recently spoken out about her choice not to have children. She believes that many women are afraid to admit they don’t want to have children.

She said despite the fact there were too many children in the world already, women who chose not to be mums were made to feel they were unnatural.

“I think women are afraid to say that they don’t want children because they’re going to get shunned,” Cameron told Cosmoplitan magazine.

“But I think that’s changing too now. I have more girlfriends who don’t have kids than those that do. And honestly? We don’t need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet.” But “I never say never. I don’t know what’s going to happen,” she said. “I could end up adopting half a dozen kids, or I could end up being the next ‘octomum’.”

I have no idea of what the deep and meaningful reasons are behind those who don’t want to have children.

But I’m sure I can come up with some general ones:

• Career driven.
• Selfish – in a good way. Likes time to themselves and with their partner.
• Maybe time just got away and the biological clock ticked too far.
• Basically they just don’t like children.

Whatever the reasons may be, obviously we are all different. So if you have decided not to have children don’t be ashamed or think you can’t voice your views. And if you know someone who has decided not to have children don’t try and understand it if you can’t. Just accept it.

A glass & a half full of sugary caffeine goodness

I was sitting in Brisbane airport last night waiting for my flight home and overheard a very strange conversation between a mother and her approx 11 year old daughter.

Let me quickly fill you in:

Daughter: Mum when we get home can I have a cup of coffee?
Mum: NO.
Daughter: But why not, Jenny’s mum let’s her drink coffee and I drink it when I’m over there.
Mum: I said no, you’re too young to be drinking coffee, it’s not good for you.

All seemed pretty normal to me until I looked up and saw that the daughter was DRINKING A BOTTLE OF COKE as was her little brother sitting next to her.

It really amazed me at this mother’s thinking. Last I’d heard, Coke was pretty bad for you and in comparison to a cup of coffee, I’d dare say (without any research or hard evidence) that a bottle of coke was probably worse than a cup of coffee! I reckon the daughter was just wanting to have a cup of coffee because it’s perceived as an adult thing to do, but I can not work out the Mother’s reasoning? Did she have the same juvenille view as her daughters that coffee was only for adults, but soft drink is different?

Some people’s parenting will never cease to amaze me!

What type of parent will you be?

Unconditional Love

If you’re wondering, get a dog and that’ll give you a pretty good indication!

On the weekend my little fur baby (AKA Jack the dog) was stung by a bee. I quickly jumped into protective Mum mode while other half was calm and checked out his paw, pulled out the sting then gave him a pat and said you’ll be right mate. I, on the other hand, sat with him on the lounge and made sure he didn’t start having a reaction, then of course gave him lots and lots of cuddles!

Cuddles with Mum!

Despite the “you’ll be right mate”, other half was still checking on him and providing some snuggles as well! It made me think, is this an indication of what we will be like as parents?! I’ve always been very relaxed around kids and know that from time to time they’ll get sick or fall and graze their knee but will I be over protective when it’s my own? Short answer, probably!

I can already see who will be the disciplinary!

When other half puts Jack outside if he’s done something wrong, as soon as Jack and I have eye contact through the glass door, I’m gone and immediately want to let him in and give him a big cuddle! Yes, sucker, I know!

So have you had pets, then kids and noticed a parenting trend?! Only time will tell for us!