Fairy Wings

When I grow up or invent time travel which ever comes first I’d like to be a kid. A blissifully happy, pink wearing, cupcake eating, fairy wing donning kind of girl.

It’s a classic case of we always want what we don’t have, until we have it and then… well you know how it goes. We spend so much time as a kid wanting to be grown up, wearing mum’s high heels and make-up, playing mum to dolls, that when we hit adulthood, sometimes it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

Suddenly school Monday – Friday 9am – 3.15pm, with a gazillion weeks holiday a year doesn’t seem so bad, or a couple of days at preschool were funfilled playdates. While pocket money wasn’t much it didn’t have to go towards a mortgage or a phone bill. Stuffing yourself full of cake and lollies was not met with ‘watch your weight’ and being a little tubby was endearing ‘baby fat’.

Putting stuff on your face consisted of pink glitter and having butterfly wings painted on your cheeks, not the pressure of making sure your foundation matched your skin tone, and the pressure of applying eyeliner with the upmost precision.

Dirty clothes meant you’d had a fantastic time playing in the park, and not that you were a grub. Chucking a sickie had less consequences, and daytime naps were encouraged, not discouraged. Oh the day time nap.

While chucking a tantrum is still met with disapproving looks, there’s nothing like the feeling of relief after having a bloody good cry. Kid, or otherwise.

An outing to the shopping centre in a princess tiara and fairy wings was met with ‘oh isn’t she just adorable’, not um, excuse me it’s not fancy dress day at Coles today, nor would it mean you’d had a massive night out at a fancy dress party and were on your way home at 10am the morning after the night before.

And so I have to leave you now and return to my adult life. But maybe I’ll sneak in a cupcake and a daytime nanna nap. However, I think I’ll save the fairy wings for, you know, things like doing the dishes. At the end of the day, it’s always good to be a big kid at heart.

Weeeh-hell you can imagine my disgust at the thought of someone ripping off the colour pink. You have taken notice of this website now haven’t you!

You may or may not be shocked to know that as little girl I would not go to preschool unless I was wearing the colour pink. Yes, please cue the violins for my long suffering mum!

I was a girly girl, no question about that, but did wearing pink harm my future. I really doubt it.

So, this UK politician has said that dressing little girls in pink is doing them harm. It teaches them to be pretty and passive and she wants a boycott. Pfft.

Check out the discussion for yourself. Clearly I agree with everything commentator Suzanne Mostyn had to say.

Does Pink Stink Video.

So, were you dressed in pink as little girl, or boy for that matter?! Can wearing a certain colour as a child really do us harm for the rest of our lives?

I recently read a very moving story written by blogger Amity Dry called: The unexpected journey to have another baby. You can read the whole article HERE.

Part of what Amity had to say got me thinking about the 12 week, or first trimester ‘rule’ when it comes to pregnancy. Most women keep quiet until the 12 week mark of their pregnancy as this is when you’re chances of miscarriage supposedly go down. That’s of course not to say it doesn’t happen after the 12 week mark.

In Amity’s article she talks of her longing for a second baby and the frustrations and emotional rollacoaster that come with infertility and miscarrage. This is the part of Amity’s article that got me thinking:

“Through all of this I was surprised by how quiet we are as a society on the subject, particularly miscarriage. It seems crazy, us women talk about pretty much anything else, but this topic remains shrouded in silence. I wonder if it’s because we keep our pregnancies secret for the first trimester, so when a miscarriage occurs within that time (which the vast majority do) we keep that a secret too. But, for me, keeping it a secret made me feel as though it was something I had to be ashamed of. A failure I had to hide. It felt as though I had to be stoic and ‘get on with things.’ So I did. I kept busy, I didn’t cry after the first day, I threw myself into my work, stayed strong and outwardly seemed like I was ok. But grief has to come out eventually, as I discovered when it came flooding out in a moment I didn’t expect.”

I can’t comment from experience as I’m yet to try for or have any children. I understand some women keeping quiet in the first 12 weeks for fear of miscarriage and not wanting to deal with the ‘we lost the baby’ conversation with family and friends, but does this contribute to Amity’s feelings above about feeling ashamed? God forbid something happened during your pregnancy would you rather people know and offer support, or would you rather ‘deal with it’ privately behind closed doors?

On a lighter note I also wonder how people actually manage to keep it quiet for 12 weeks, or 10 weeks or you know however long from when you find out your pregnant. These days there’s so many things you’re not meant to eat, drink, breathe in, look at, that it would be so difficult not to get caught out, you’d almost need a University Degree in ‘How to keep your bun in the oven quiet during the first trimester’.

So, as always what do you think? Is the ‘12 week rule’ old fashioned, or sensible medically related practice? When did you or your wife/partner tell people you were pregnant? And if you have any funny stories to share on trying to keep bubs quiet for the first trimester, please share. As I said I’m always intrigued how people actually manage to pull it off!

And just for the record, no I’m not pregnant!

So I have this idea of what it’s going to be like to be a mum. Or maybe I should re-phrase that. I have this idea of what I would like it to be like to be a mum!

Let’s just say in my head at the moment it’s like being in one of those cartoons, where you’ve got the little angel on one shoulder and little devil on the other.

The angel is saying to me, oh it’s going to be so wonderful, you’ll dress the bub in cute little clothes and go for long strolls to the cafe where we’ll sit and enjoy a hot choccy and bub will be so well behaved.

We’ll go to the shopping centre, then come home snuggle on the lounge have lots of laughs, we’ll both have nap time and all will be hunky dory.

And it would appear I’m not the only one with these thoughts! At breakfast on Sunday, a friend of ours pipes up and says that he would love to be a stay-at-home-dad and meet my husband down the local cafe for coffees, and then no doubt go and hang out on the their yachts with bubs! Yes all hunky dory isn’t it! Gotta love the angel take on a Mum’s life!

THEN! Then the DEVIL pipes up – ‘are you freaking kidding me’.

Nuff said!

For a look at what a Mum does all day, check out Jodie’s blog: www.mummy-mayhem.blogspot.com, and especially this post: What do you do all day!

Happy Friday!

There was a couple a few tables over with a baby in a high chair. I first noticed the baby because I thought he was cute! BUT, then unfortunately we noticed the baby because he was making such a bloody racket! The parents at first mostly ignored him and then just kept putting toys and food on his high chair. My other half was making some very noticeable disapproving noises and then the father decided to take the baby outside for a bit. Good decision.

They then came back in, kid was still crying and the mother thought it was ok to stay at the table. Thankfully the father didn’t agree and finally they left.

Now, if you talk about this topic with my delightful other half he will tell you he HATES screaming/noisy children in a cafe or restaurant or actually any public place. It’s not that he dislikes children he just doesn’t like being disturbed by them especially when they’re not his children or part of our family! He is always the guy that shoots the parents a filthy look to make his disgust known!

I, on the other hand prefer to suffer in silence. It’s probably hard enough for the parents and lord knows children can be very unpredictable. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t agree with parents staying put and letting their children carry on like porkchops, but it would have to get pretty bad for me to make known how annoyed I was!

So what do you think? Should people be tolerant of misbehaving, noisy children in a public place, like a restaurant, or do we all have the right to enjoy our meal out and make known our displeasure at someone else’s little darling kicking up a fuss?!

So, they have been friends for ever, about 26 years and apparently had a fling back in the day. Todd is gay and Sonia is recently divorced, both are 44. Todd has a daughter with a another close friend.

So where is all this going!! It was revealed yesterday in the Australian Women’s Weekly that Todd has asked Sonia to have a baby with him.

He loves kids, she loves kids, she wants a baby, and knows her biological clock is ticking and might not find Mr Right in time and he would like another child. All sounds good to me. So, end of story? Not quite, of course I have something else to say!

I honestly think that it is a fantastic idea. In this day and age becoming a parent is not as simple anymore as just having sex, and nor should it be. If mother nature or circumstances decides that a woman can’t carry a baby or concieve the old fashioned way then she shouldn’t have to accept it and get over it. People who often have to go to greater lengths to have a baby will no doubt make wonderful parents to their much wanted child. Would they make better parents because they have had to work harder to have a baby? Maybe? Who knows.

Anyway so what are your thoughts on the Sonia and Todd situation? We recently saw the story of the gay couple who travelled all the way to India to have a surrogate give birth to their twin girls. They copped plenty of flak for their decision but I guarantee you they are making wonderful parents.

Lord knows there’s plenty of people out there becoming parents the old fashioned way who shouldn’t even be given the responsibility of a gold fish let alone another human being.

So once again just because you can’t become a parent the old fashioned way, does that mean who shouldn’t be able to? You know what I think, what do you think?

The concept of not wanting to have children is completely foreign to me but that doesn’t mean that I’m not interested in those who have chosen not to reproduce.

Sometimes I think that there are women who talk about having kids because that’s what society expects of us. I had a friend in high school who did not like kids at all, but yet would still talk about having children. I wonder if she thought she’d ‘like kids’ by the time she came to have children or if she talked about kids because that’s what was expected of her? I have no idea if she has kids now.

Actress Cameron Diaz recently spoken out about her choice not to have children. She believes that many women are afraid to admit they don’t want to have children.

She said despite the fact there were too many children in the world already, women who chose not to be mums were made to feel they were unnatural.

“I think women are afraid to say that they don’t want children because they’re going to get shunned,” Cameron told Cosmoplitan magazine.

“But I think that’s changing too now. I have more girlfriends who don’t have kids than those that do. And honestly? We don’t need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet.” But “I never say never. I don’t know what’s going to happen,” she said. “I could end up adopting half a dozen kids, or I could end up being the next ‘octomum’.”

I have no idea of what the deep and meaningful reasons are behind those who don’t want to have children.

But I’m sure I can come up with some general ones:

• Career driven.
• Selfish – in a good way. Likes time to themselves and with their partner.
• Maybe time just got away and the biological clock ticked too far.
• Basically they just don’t like children.

Whatever the reasons may be, obviously we are all different. So if you have decided not to have children don’t be ashamed or think you can’t voice your views. And if you know someone who has decided not to have children don’t try and understand it if you can’t. Just accept it.

Senator Sarah Hanson-Young & daughter Kora

If I had a child I certainly wouldn’t be taking them to work, so why should it be any different for a Sentor in Parliament. The story which was on last night’s news and on ninemsn today, told of how the Senator felt so humilated when she had to hand her young daughter to someone while the Parliament took a vote. She has called for better child care for parliamentary members.

I’m sorry but what a joke. Why do these politicians think they are above everybody else. There are thousands of other working mum’s that have to put their child/children into daycare so they can go to work, so why should it be any different in this case.

I understand the child may have been distressed when her mother handed her over to a stranger, but really, Sentor Hanson-Young only has herself to blame for putting her and her daughter in that inappropriate situation.

Clearly I’m not the only one with this view. Ninemsn is currently running a poll on:
Should Politicians be allowed to bring kids to the senate?
Yes: 2,357.
No:11,421.

If this is a new trend, maybe I’ll start brining my baby to work. Fur baby that is. Won’t the boss just love that!

My auntie & I about 24yrs ago!

For as long as I can remember having an auntie meant having this cool older person to take you out and to go and stay with during the school holidays. They were old enough to be trusted with you without giving you the ‘I’ll tell you what to do’ mum vibe!

I have 2 younger cousins 6 and 3 so I’m kinda more like their auntie than cousin and I inherited 2 nephews and a niece from my other half.  (Much to my other half’s disgust our niece would much rather hang out with me! I think me being a girl with jewellery and “precious precious things” as she so cutely puts it kinda helps!)

I find myself getting very excited prior to each visit with any of the little people in our families! For a person with very little patience I could sit for hours with our niece and put the dolls to bed, wake them up and… well you know how it keeps going!

The conversations you can have with a 2 year old completely amaze me! I got the run down a few weeks ago from our niece about how the new baby (her mum is due in about 6weeks) was “moving in”. Yep the baby is “moving into the room next door”. So very grown up and so very matter of fact! When asked if she was ready to hop out of the bath she replied “Goodo”! It was hysterical and a reminder to watch what we say around kids – she tells me she got that word from her mum!

I haven’t even got started on my cousin who I’m convinced will grow up to be Prime Minister and his super cheeky and imaginative little brother, not to mention our nephew nearly 4 who seems to become more grown up every visit and his cool dude little brother who just seems to take everything in! Listen to me, gosh I could just gush all day but I won’t!

So being an auntie really is a great privilege. It’s kind of like fun parenting 101 with only a few dirty nappies along the way (unless you’re Uncle John and you’ve managed to avoid a nappy change all together!)

It feels like only yesterday for me that I was off again on school holidays to hang out with my cool auntie and uncle in Sydney! So enjoy being an auntie, because they do grow up so quickly.

I recently came across a fanastic website www.savvyauntie.com. Unfortunately it is American so not all the information applies to us, however some of the other ideas on there is fantastic.