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Like most the country & indeed the world, I spent most of Monday constantly checking the news, watching the horrible Sydney Siege. I held my breath & felt my heart stop each time hostages ran out.

By 9.30pm I couldn’t keep my eyes open. With 2 night feeds in my immediate future, I went to bed. I hoped and prayed that the next day would bring wonderful news…

Half way through feeding the baby at around midnight, I remembered. I checked my phone desperately looking for news of a peaceful end, but nothing. It was still going.

All the kids were up around 5.30am. I got up and I remembered. I turned on the TV, almost holding my breath and watched as they reported that 3 people were dead. The victims a 34 year old man and a 38 year old woman. Please God, don’t let them be parents. Don’t let this awful awful tragedy be any worse. Sadly it was. 3 little children lost their mum in the early hours of that horrific morning. While we were sleeping, subconsciously hoping & praying, 2 innocent people, protecting others paid the ultimate price. Their families lives changed forever. Our lives and our country changed forever.

I feel like we lost something that day. A sense of innocence. A hope that this would never happen to ‘us’. But it did.

The outpouring of grief has shown what this country is really about. I know that if we could, each and everyone of us would hug the families of the victims and the 15 other hostages.

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that” Martin Luther King, Jr

RIP xx

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