How an Aussie Supermodel stole my life…

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So after reading Kerri Sackville’s hilarious post’s on how Nicole Kidman stole her life, part 1 and now today part 2 (click HERE to read them) I decided that I too should share how a famous celebrity unashamedly stole my future life as a glamourous supermodel and ruined my potential of dating one of hollywoods hottest young actor’s.

Yes I am of course talking about none other than Miranda Kerr.

Miranda Kerr 2nd from left. Me on the right with very curly hair!

Miranda Kerr 2nd from left. Me on the right with very curly hair!

You see as a youngen I was an aspiring model. Actually let me rephrase that, I was an aspiring Supermodel. To the top of the modelling world I was going. I was going to have my hair and makeup done every day to look totally glamourous and I was going to strut my stuff up and down international catwalks like I was king shit, or queen shit, or whatever, you get my drift.

I was well on my way too when I was sponsored by the local Just Jeans and Fashion Fair for the local modelling comps in my good ol’ home town of Tamworth. Super tough competition in the country I’ll have you know. Then there was a new chick on the block. A petit gal from country Gunnedah who travelled to Tamworth to compete in the local comps. And that folks is when my world came crashing down!

And the runner up is….. Ami Holder. And the winner is…. Miranda Kerr. And so on it went that Miss Kerr won numerous times in fact. I remember ‘backstage’ at one comp, Miranda turned to me lifted up her arms and said ‘oh no I forgot to shave under my arms’. Don’t worry I said, no one will notice. Inside thinking, god I hope the judges see. Yes, I was a 13 year old bitch, but I desparately wanted to beat her. And of course I didn’t!

And then she won the Dolly covergirl competition. So while her world was thrown into modelling chaos heaven and she posed with the likes of Callan Mulvey for Dolly covers and no doubt ate lettuce leaves and carrot sticks, I went to school, came home watched the Bold and the Beautiful and ate chocolate biscuits!

I remember one of my mum’s friends who came along to one comp, said oh don’t worry she (Miranda) definitely won’t win, she’s way too skinny. What do they know – the rest is history!

However I wasn’t going to let Miranda’s success get in the way of my dreams, no-siree. It spurred me on and at the ripe old age of 16 I won the local Country Catwalk competition. How? Why? Almost certainly because Miranda was probably off on some island doing an exoctic swimwear shoot and was a little too busy to give me a run for my money in the local country modelling comp.

Then I turned 17 and decided to retire. Modelling was you know like seriously overrated and I decided to focus on my studies. Well, go to school anyway. And there was the small detail of not getting out there and finding a modelling contract or losing 4 kilos like one modelling judge suggested I do. (5ft 8″ and 55kg, and they wonder why teenage girls get weight issues. Anyway that’s another subject).  So there you have it, the story of the modelling career that never was.

And to Orlando, I’m sorry you got stuck with Miranda instead of me, but I’m sure you’re doing just fine!

  • Ben
    October 22, 2009

    Well Ami i think you ended up with twice the man Orlando is anyway. Literally TWICE ;)

  • Anne
    October 22, 2009

    A least you know John is for life, Orlando won’t be, well maybe not.

  • KerriSackville
    October 23, 2009

    Ah… so you share my broken dreams… the pain never quite heals….. (okay, it does, but that sounds quite poetic, right???)

  • Joy
    December 8, 2010

    This had to be one of the most annoying posts ever. Miranda is beautiful, humble, healthy, has her own organic skin care line and a new book out. Not to mention she is married and carrying the child of one of the hottest guys alive. It’s easy to get envious but to write a post about her this way is pathetic. I guess you just gave up to soon and didn’t have enough confidence. Anyways obviously I’m a fan of hers. I hope I didn’t offend you, you wrote your opinion on her and this is mine.

    Thanks. Joy.

  • Ami
    December 8, 2010

    Hi Joy, I’m very sorry you feel that way and failed to see that the post was actually written in a sarcastic way and meant to be funny. Miranda was and I’m sure still is a lovely person and I wish her, her husband and their future baby nothing but the best.

    I too am married to a hot wonderful guy and have a beautiful new baby.

    Thanks for your comment.

  • Ward
    February 8, 2011

    so if I understand correctly the Dolly competition was not his first incursion into fashion, and if I have not misunderstood she was not accidentally in that competition but wanted to be a model and go there on purpose. Curious, I always read/hear the story of her friends were the ones who sent the photos to Dolly magazine and that she had no interest in modelling. Curious good to know. Thanks.

  • Ward
    February 9, 2011

    Hi, some questions: When was this competition? month, day, year.
    they lend you the clothes?
    Your dress is very similar to the girl on the left, was on purpose?

  • Ami
    February 9, 2011

    I’m unsure who entered Miranda in the Dolly comp. But given she had been entering in the catwalk comps I’m sure she had an interest in modelling.

    The year was probably around 1996, and you wore your own clothes, or were sponsored by a local fashion store. The similar dresses were just a coincidence.

  • mary
    August 22, 2011

    This has to be one of the most interesting stories I have ever read. You should send this to a celebrity gossip magazine or something! Miranda does look very very skinny in this photo and it was interesting to find out that she entered other modelling competitions before. awesome awesome post

  • Thea
    August 22, 2011

    OH.MY.GOD! I’m star struck….I always knew you were gorgeous…but WOW!!! Love this. I recognized you immediately in your photo…didn’t recognize Miranda though. Looks like you both lucked out. I’m guessing you might be a smidge happier but. ;)

  • cass
    August 23, 2011

    oh man can’t believe anyone took that as ofensive… i guess especially since i know you wouldn’t trade your life for anything. Every young girl wants to be queen, it is in our hearts to feel beatiful and loved, and every girl always feels second to someone else (i know how often i wished i were as beautiful as you, but that was a goal i could never reach… bitch you stole my life lol). Miranda is gorgeous and exactly where she is meant to be, you are gorgeous and exactly where you are meant to be, i am gorgeous and where i am meant to be (mind you still wish i looked as good as you after giving birth hehehe). All women are beautiful and hopefully feel they ended up exactly where they were meant to be, i love the way you so hormorously and intelligently conveyed that message… end rant…

  • Lisa
    July 20, 2012

    I share a similar situation. I was in the 1994 Model Quest grand final with Miranda Kerr 8-12yo division. Neither of us won, so we were both robbed :) but still a great story to tell my friends.

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