I recently wrote about “Flicking the Mummy Switch” and how and when you decide that you want to have kids. I thought we’d explore the other side of having little people, and that’s choosing not to have them at all.
The concept of not wanting to have children is completely foreign to me but that doesn’t mean that I’m not interested in those who have chosen not to reproduce.
Sometimes I think that there are women who talk about having kids because that’s what society expects of us. I had a friend in high school who did not like kids at all, but yet would still talk about having children. I wonder if she thought she’d ‘like kids’ by the time she came to have children or if she talked about kids because that’s what was expected of her? I have no idea if she has kids now.
Actress Cameron Diaz recently spoken out about her choice not to have children. She believes that many women are afraid to admit they don’t want to have children.
She said despite the fact there were too many children in the world already, women who chose not to be mums were made to feel they were unnatural.
“I think women are afraid to say that they don’t want children because they’re going to get shunned,” Cameron told Cosmoplitan magazine.
“But I think that’s changing too now. I have more girlfriends who don’t have kids than those that do. And honestly? We don’t need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet.” But “I never say never. I don’t know what’s going to happen,” she said. “I could end up adopting half a dozen kids, or I could end up being the next ‘octomum’.”
I have no idea of what the deep and meaningful reasons are behind those who don’t want to have children.
But I’m sure I can come up with some general ones:
- Career driven.
- Selfish – in a good way. Likes time to themselves and with their partner.
- Maybe time just got away and the biological clock ticked too far.
- Basically they just don’t like children.
Whatever the reasons may be, obviously we are all different. So if you have decided not to have children don’t be ashamed or think you can’t voice your views. And if you know someone who has decided not to have children don’t try and understand it if you can’t. Just accept it.