There’s 2 things you need to know about my husband. 1: He usually says no to a lot of my requests/suggestions. And 2: If I don’t nag and bide my time he usually comes around.
When I met John he was a mid-30 year old confirmed bachelor. Nice house, immaculate, minimalist, I called it the museum.
Then I came along! After 8 weeks together I moved in. First change to the ‘museum’ was to add some photographs. And as time went on we bought a couple more pieces of furniture, added more pictures, got a dog and suddenly the museum became a home.
Before we got married we decided to extend the warehouse and add another bedroom and bathroom. Yes we were forward planning for a family. (By the way NONE of my suggesstions were entertained during this process. That’s the problem when you live with an Architect!) So, we’d talked about starting a family after we got back from our overseas holiday. But of course I had other ideas. After our September wedding, I started dropping hints about November that if we were to fall pregnant by February it would perfectly safe for me to fly and I wouldn’t be hugely pregnant during our trip. After some negotiating a few days later I was off the pill. And at the end of January the stick said pregnant. All 5 of them!
Of course I wanted to decorate ‘the nursery’ straight away. Sensibly John made me wait until we got back from overseas. I was about 23 weeks by then. I wanted to paint, do wall stickers, the lot. Unfortuantely this was one argument that John won. We compromised, John kept his pristine white walls, but I got to put holes in them and put up some pictures and shelves! I wasn’t however ‘allowed’ to put letters on the door.
“We’ll need a bath in the house you know”, I said one day. Which was met with a no we won’t, and the baby can have a bath in the laundry tub, and then it can have a shower. Clearly no point in arguing, but I thought I’d try, “Well maybe I’d like a bath”. Nup, still didn’t work. So gradually over a couple of months I did some subtle nagging, and the week before I was due a free standing bath arrived. Sigh, I was looking forward to relaxing in the bath, with my huge belly and very swollen feet. But to my dismay something didn’t fit properly on the bath and they had to take it back. That was on the Wednesday. Saturday night I went into labour. I called the hospital, where the lovelyy midwife told me to have a bath. “We don’t have a farking bath because it arrived and it was the wrong size or something”. Ok, so maybe just a shower then. Anyway we finally got our bath when Sophie was 2 weeks old. She lasted only about a week in the laundry tub, a couple of weeks in the baby bath, and now is of course in the big bath. Yep, tick to Mum for that one.
Early on in my pregnancy the nappy talk started. “4 boys and 1 nappy is all my Dad did” sprouted my darling husband. “Well don’t think you’re getting off that lightly” I replied. And so went the nappy debate for oh about 6 months of my pregnancy. I knew deep down that when push came to shove he’d change a nappy if he really had to.
So then after our beautiful baby girl was born and I started struggling with the feeding, was totally exhausted and just wanted to crawl under the bed and sleep for a week, suddenly the I’m not changing nappies man, became THE nappy changer. I’d like to say I was amazed but I knew he would make a wonderful Dad. So John, the new chief nappy changer, even got up in the middle of the night in those first few weeks to do the nappy change while I sat there trying to get lumps out of my boobs (lovely I know) or pump. It didn’t take long for the spruking to begin: “I’ve changed more nappies than you!” This was one statement I was more than happy to smile and agree with.
And to say John is a hands on Dad is understatement. Hugely protective of his baby girl, they always have chats and cuddles every morning before he goes to work. To hear him say he was totally smitten from the first moment, truly makes my heart smile. Yes all together now, aaaaawwwwww.
So for a while I was mentioning putting letters on the baby’s door. No, no and no, were the responses. “What about just the first initial of the baby’s name?” I thought I’d try. “Maybe”. Then for Sophie’s Naming Day she received beautiful letters for her door. Suddenly on Saturday, he’s telling me to get the leveling thingy out of the garage, find the double-sided tap and let’s put Sophie’s letters on her door. Woohoo, another tick for Mum!
So the latest negotiations that I’m slowly working on is the upcoming renovation of our garage into a rumpus room. I admit, with John being an Architect he knows a little more about design than I do! That’s why I haven’t got in the way when it came to designing the new 3 car garage and loft to go out the back. Ok, so maybe I got in the way a little when it came to timing. (We bought the little house behind us, and are going to knock it down. It was a long term plan, but with a dog and a bub we’re now hopefully starting in March!) So the current garage with a door into the house will become a rumpus room. I’d like to’design’ it. I use the term ‘design’ loosely. All I’d really like to do is put some cool wall stickers on the wall, make it nice and bright and fun. Cool storage boxes for toys, and have a little table and chairs area for Sophie when she’s older. Currently negotiations have stalled. As in, John just ignores my requests! But that’s ok. As usual I’ll just bide my time, and keep searching on the net for the perfect wall stickers, that I’ll no doubt be able to put up eventually! Fingers crossed!