Blessed, lucky, lying, proud or guilty?

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I'm a good baby. Most of the time!

I started writing this post about a month ago and keep meaning to finish it and of course haven’t seem to have gotten around to it. My poor little blog has been somewhat neglected lately along with other blog reading and commenting and most other things in my life like shaving my legs, and you know actually giving a shit how I look. However my baby girl is never neglected and that’s the main thing. So where the hell am I going with this post? Good question. I’ll start where I began the other week and maybe by the time I finish the bloody thing Sophie will be sleeping through the night again.

So a few weeks ago, probably more now, I read a debate online, can’t remember where, about how we talk about our kids and more specifically when they’re babies.

So the general gist of the, let’s call it a discussion, was that parents who say their kids are perfect are lying. Or so extremely blessed they even get pictures of Jesus turning up in their vegemite toast.

Now to say that it kinda ticked me off would be an understatement. So much so I’ve ranted and raved and rewrote this post at least 20 times in my head to try and make sense of my highly aggravated thoughts.

What I need is a record button in my head so I can remember all the crap I carry on with in there. Anyway, I’m digressing.

You see we have an awesome baby. If I do say so myself. Hubby & I are pretty chuffed with ourselves on the champion little bub that is our nearly 5 month old, Sophie.

When people ask me if she’s a good baby, my instant reply is yes. And that’s because 90% of the time she is a great baby. From 3 months she started sleeping through the night, on and off. Some nights she goes down at 6.30pm and sleeps for 12 hours and other nights we’ll battle to get her to settle before 8.30pm but then she’ll usually sleep until 5.30am. So hubby and I are fortunate that we’re actually getting to deposit into our sleep bank.

So while Soph appears to be a little trooper at night, during the day, not so much. She very rarely has all of her day time sleeps but for the most part is a happy camper when she’s awake during the day.

Maybe we are just lucky. Maybe it’s because we have a routine and we stick to it no matter how shit the day is going. If we were religious maybe I’d say we were blessed. Nobody’s baby is perfect. But some are definitely easier than others.

Why on earth would I lie and say my baby was a shitty sleeper when she’s not? Would it make other parents feel better? Is it more acceptable to have a whinge than to be proud? Should I feel guilty? Or should I feel proud that we must be doing something right, or maybe put simply we just got a good one?

The competitiveness and jealousy that can occur between parents is really quite sad. I’m very proud of my little bub who sleeps at night, barely cries when her mummy burns her arm, and takes it all in her stride when it’s been a long day and she could easily lose her shit way worse than she does. (Thankfully she seems to have inherited her Dad’s chilled out-ness).

But would everyone feel better if I exaggerated her screaming sessions from 5 minutes to 5 hours and reduced the number hours she often sleeps at night from 12 to 2 hours?

I think we’re doing a pretty good job for rookie parents, but it is hard not to look like you’re constantly blowing your own trumpet, because not everyone is as lucky as we are.

Would you rather hear a Mum whingeing about her horrid baby that never sleeps or listen to a Mum’s happy story of being able to get a decent nights sleep again?

A recent article in a parenting magazine basically said if parents tell you their baby slept 12 hours last night they’re lying. Well guess what lady, my baby does (on and off) and I’m not afraid to say it. Lucky? Shit yeah. Absolutely tickled pink? Bloody oath. Why would I lie about that? So people don’t think I’m a bad parent because I can’t get my baby to sleep 12 hours? Every. Baby. Is. Different. But why is just as bigger deal made of the parent’s who talk about their ‘good ones’ as the ‘bad ones’.

It really is a no win situation. You either end up sounding like a whinger or a gloater. Is there a happy medium?

Ok. Rant. Over.

  • Madeline
    March 2, 2011

    I hate that ‘good baby’ question! And yeah, I wouldn’t worry about making other people feel better by exaggerating the ‘bad’ parts. As you said, every baby is different. My (second) baby is a week younger than your Sophie. He was sleeping through the night from 8 weeks but has just started waking up again in the last couple of weeks. I’m hopeful he’ll soon remember how to again, but in the meantime he’s still a good baby.

  • Big bro
    March 3, 2011

    Opinions , everyone has them and everyones different. My opinion is as you know I am two a proud parent of a princess . Is she “good” my answer would be and will always be yes. Why? Because did I mention she’s our princess . On the topic of gloating my baby girl sleeps very well at night. Yes we are blessed but let’s face it even if she only sleeps half this she is and always will be a good baby. Do I feel guilty? Hell no. I’m with you on this one why should we feel bad. For those who some what critisise get over it . In saying we parents lie about having perfect babies . News flash people who are you to say we don’t. Anyway enough rambling like I said everyone’s different . What’s the answer to this? I say gloat be proud because all this says to me is that like our princess , Sophie is lucky to have such loving and caring proud parents. Isn’t it still said today that “parents know best”.

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